Alaska...love it or suck it!

Can I just start by saying how much I loved last nights episode!  When Kathy called up Levi Johnston to let him know that they were coming to Alaska I knew it would be good but not so good that I was laughing out loud...by myself.  So basically Kathy was doing a stand-up show in Anchorage so she decided to cruise through Wusilla to party with Levi, her "boyfriend".  We got to see where Levi lives & meet his mostly mute roommate who acted very homophobic when Kathy asked him if he saw the Playgirl.  That leads me to believe that yes he saw it, I mean come on...if your friend was in a porn mag like you wouldn't check it out?  I had a friend in one once & I bought a copy & I still have it!

Well after that Kathy decided to go ice fishing with Levi & his buddies & she actually used one of those giant ice drills to get the hole dug (with Levi's assistance of course) and that was hilarious because she was afraid she would cut her own leg off.  She said the fishing was actually fun & quite relaxing & she could do it all day but she had to leave to go to a book signing.  She took Levi with her to Border's for the signing so he could sign his Playgirl but the store wouldn't let him.  Have no fear though, the gays had the magazine stuffed in their sleeves & Levi was able to sign a decent amount of them without getting caught.

Aside from the book signing Kathy visited the local museum & got her mom a Sarah Palin t-shirt as well as one for her maid to clean with.  There were a million other hysterical moments in this episode including the hunt to find Tiffany a man so I highly suggest you tune in & check it out on a rerun if you haven't seen it already.
 

It's a big night for FX

Tonight you need to tune in to FX at 10 PM for the season premiere of Rescue Me & then following that at 11 is the series premiere of Louie...the new comedy series by master of funny, Louis C.K.
 

New Big Brother!!

Coming up next week on Thursday July 8th at 8 PM is the premiere of the new season of Big Brother!  My mom got me hooked on this show & I'm now a bit of a junkie.  I just hope this season has someone as yummy as Jeff to stare at or I may get a little bored.  This is now the 12th season of this show & I didn't start watching faithfully until a few seasons ago maybe like season 8 or 9 so I often feel left out when they do games & have trivia going back to season one but I'm not the one who trying to win a bunch of money so I guess it doesn't matter.  I am happy though that in a couple weeks I have to add Showtime back so I can watch Weeds & Showtime 2 shows "Big Brother After Dark" from midnight to 3 am so I like to DVR that and skim it to see if anything good happened over night.
 

ABC Family premiere night!

Tonight on ABC Family we have the series premiere of Huge based on the book by Sasha Paley and starring Nikki Blonsky from Hairspray (the movie version of the musical based on the good movie).  Anyway, that's on at 9 PM and then at 10 PM is the season premiere of Make It Or Break It.  This is a TV show based on a movie...is anything original anymore?  Anyway, happy viewing people!!
 

HBO Sunday grows!

Woot, Sunday TV is back in full force!  Tune in to HBO at 9 of course for True Blood but don't change the channel after that's over because your favorite gigolo & prick talent agent are both back in the new seasons of Hung at 10 and Entourage at 10:30!! 
 

Bethenny Getting Married?

I'm definitely watching the premiere season of Bethenny Getting Married? on Bravo! and I'm sure you aren't surprised by that one bit.  She is probably one of my favorite housewives out of all of the casts so I was very happy to see her get her own show.  Now that it's her show I have to say that I like Jason and I really didn't when I saw him on Housewives, he just seemed like an arrogant douche but I think that was because he was on so minimally it was hard to really see what he was like.

From season to season I always identified with Bethenny because like me she was guarded, set in her ways, open, honest, funny, perpetually single, and surrounded by couples everywhere she looked.  Now that she is successful & pregnant & married I don't identify with her anymore aside from the honest & funny.  Now that I see why she is guarded given her shitty upbringing I don't identify with that anymore either but I still adore her so much.  Seeing her with Jason made me realize that sooner or later I will find someone but I'll skip the whole baby part...that is not for me at all.  Anyway, this weeks episode stressed me out looking at how stressed out she was...who in the hell takes on that much when they are pregnant?  Who in the hell takes on that much when they aren't?

The wedding planner guy is kind of annoying but he's also pretty funny when he shows just how terrified of Bethenny he really is.  The whole cake thing next week looks intense but I totally get where the planner guy is coming from because Bethenny is too busy to plan a wedding & it's going down like tomorrow so she has to relinquish some of the details to him.  My favorite part of last nights episode was the book signing at Costco & the 3 people that showed up.  Watching them shopping at Costco was like watching myself!  Is there a Costco in Manhattan?  You can't buy anything from there if you are on foot!

Jason in the "Bride to Be" sash the morning after the bachelor/ette party was a trip. Watching her eat ribs at the party & hearing her talk about eating burgers the next morning makes me jealous that she's so thin!  I know she primarily eats healthy but they rarely show that on any of her shows.  I can't wait to see the actual wedding & I'm so excited that she got the venue she wanted!
 

2 Shows tonight

Tonight at 9 PM we have the premiere of the series Rookie Blue on ABC and then up at 10 PM is the season premiere of Futurama on Comedy Central.
 

Eric, Bill or the new guy?

Screw this Edward or Jacob crap...I mean really, like there's even a challenge on that one!  Edward is fangless & fugs & the dude can't act very well not to mention his crazy eyes that always look "intense".  Now, Jacob is one fine looking young man with those freaking abs & the rest of his body...damn.  Personally I think that the kid who plays him is gay & I'm not actually a Twilight fan but I'm definitely a huge fan of a young hot guy with a banging body.  Oh right, this post had a purpose...who's your favorite vampire that actually has fangs?  Cast your vote on the poll at the top of the page.

 

Oh Sookie

If you didn't get the chance to see it here is Snoop Dogg's video for his True Blood dedication to Sookie who he would really like to get with.  I just love all of the Sookie's dancing in the background & seeing his pimp ass ride parked outside of Merlott's is freaking hysterical.  Enjoy.

 

TNT Premieres

Tonight we have 2 shows premiering on TNT.  First up at 9 PM is the return of HawthoRNe starring Jada Pinkett Smith.  I didn't watch the first season of this show and won't likely watch this season either but according to the TNT site this is what the show is about "HAWTHORNE is told from the point of view of nurses as they struggle against the odds to deliver the best care possible."  Sounds pretty decent to me & if it's the second season it couldn't be all bad right?  

After that at 10 PM we have the series premiere of Memphis Beat starring Jason Lee (best known as Earl) as a blues loving detective in Memphis.  The TNT describes it as "Memphis Beat centers on Dwight Hendricks (Jason Lee), a quirky Memphis police detective with an intimate connection to the city, a passion for blues music and a close relationship with his mother. He is "the keeper of Memphis," a Southern gentleman who is protective of his fellow citizens, reverential of the city's history and deeply rooted in its blues music scene."  I might have to check this one out as I'm a fan of Memphis & a fan of Jason Lee.

 

Top Chef D.C. starts tonight!

Eric Ripert is the new judge on the show which is pretty sweet...I thought he'd be replacing someone but after reading about the new cast he's just a 4th judge.  Anyway, if you want to read more about the cheftestants then click here otherwise just tune it to Bravo! at 9 PM & see for yourself.

After Top Chef you might be interested in the new show Hot In Cleveland which stars Valerie Bertinelli, Wendy Malick, Jane Leeves & the hilarious Betty White!  Not exactly a guys type show but it premieres tonight on TV Land at 10 PM.
 

My shows this week

Let's start with True Blood shall we?  Um, Eric is hot...not the guy that plays him but Eric.  When he was banging that chick & Sookie walked in I was honestly jealous of the girl he was giving it to & when Sookie was talking to him all I could think was "I wonder what his package is like".  Tara seems to still be possessed by the crazy bitch from last season, Jessica is an idiot, and I thought Anna was really overacting in this episode, almost like I could hear "action" rather than the scenes flowing so hopefully that gets better as the season goes on.  Poor Jason seeing bullet holes in those chicks was pretty funny & I thoroughly enjoyed his abs as well.

Next up is The D List premiere which was good because we got to see Kathy 100% without makeup & hair, her mom was on it & she's a trip, and Kathy was on Law & Order SUV which was pretty cool seeing her back in action in a drama role & not a reality role.  Tom is still ripping out his eyebrows & lashes, Tiffany is all skinny, and Liza was on too.

The Hills & The City were both pretty boring so I don't have much to say on those.

The 2nd installment of the Housewives was pretty good especially when everyone was telling Kelly that she's crazy because she is.  The next installment of the reunion looks like it will be the best part so I'll save all the rest of my comments for that.

The Jersey wives...come on!  Dina left the show, crazy ass Danielle was even more crazy & behaving like a 13 year old girl again.  Teresa is in a crap load of debt & they live way beyond their means (learned in magazine not on show but it relates) and apparently borrow approximately $10K a month from friends & family.  Seriously?  Stupid freaking people, I swear to God!!

I'm pretty sure that's all I have to discuss at this point & I hope your TV viewing this week has been treating you well!
 

The D List returns!!!!

Hey there all gays & other Kathy Griffin lovers...don't miss the new season of Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List tonight at 9 PM on Bravo!  Her new stand-up special "Kathy Griffin Does the Bible Belt" was on last week & it was funny but not as funny as it usually is so I really wished I had gone to see her live again to get all the good stuff!  So speaking of Bravo & Kathy I was watching part 2 of the NYC Housewives reunion last night & I'm a big Bethenny fan but she steals a lot of her "bits" from Kathy.  She said "holy shit balls" which is pure Kathy & she mentioned twatting as well & we all know that's 100% Kathy.  I'm not going to hold it against her as I steal both Kathy & Bethenny's bits often but I don't do it on Bravo where they both work.  I'm just curious if Kathy saw it & thought "that's my line you skinny bitch".  Kathy will be on Watch What Happens Live on Thursday so who knows...maybe I'll tweet a question to Andy & find out what she thinks!

On a side note regarding the reunion...I totally got it once Jill made that snarky remark to Sonja & was trying to "make a joke like Bethenny" that she says these things because if Bethenny said it everyone would know it was a joke but she's missing one thing...the delivery.  Bethenny has a witty way of delivering an insulting joke and when Jill says it there is no joke it's just an insult so basically what I'm saying is that Jill just needs to stop trying to be Bethanny.
 

It's True Blood day!!!

It's here, I'm so excited!!!  Season 3 of True Blood starts tonight on HBO at 9 PM and I can't freaking wait.  I've been watching so many previews and this season certainly promises more sex, blood, and weird ass shit and how can that not make for good television?  I heard that Lafayette will finally get a love interest this season and that makes me so very happy since he is one of my favorite characters on the show.  This season promises plenty of new faces & story lines to keep us & all of the wanna be fang bangers sucked in.  Here's the preview for this upcoming season.

 

The Housewife insanity ensues!

Tonight at 9 PM on Bravo! be sure to tune in for part 1 of the Real Housewives of NYC reunion show.  This one apparently promises to be the craziest yet & you all know that I loves me some crazy!  Following the reunion is the premiere of Bethanny Getting Married? at 10 PM also on Bravo!  I'm so looking forward to both of these that I'm really wishing I didn't have dinner plans but that is what the DVR is for.

If you aren't a Bravo!/annoying chick show fan then you can tune in to the return of Pen & Teller: Bullshit! at 10 PM on Showtime.

Yes I'm excited for tonight but nothing can top my excitement for the return of True Blood on Sunday!!!
 

Top Chef Masters & Work of Art

Tonight is a busy night for Bravo! The season finale of Top Chef Masters is on at 10 and then following that at 11 is Work of Art which is produced by SJP & her hubs.  I'll be tuning in for both & I'm unsure about the finale of Top Chef Masters because all of my favorite people have already been bumped off and I don't think I would eat the food of any of the people left except maybe Susur Lee so I'll put my vote for him.  Susur is up against Rick Moonen and Marcus Samuelsson so it's a tough battle!

 

Danielle "crazy bitch" Staub has a sex tape?

God help us all, Danielle Staub has a sex tape that is apparently going to be released by Hustler Inc. on June 14th.  Now, last year she had a tape that she apparently was able to block from being released so that made me wonder when I heard about this one...did she block it so she could sell it herself?  I certainly wouldn't put it past this dirt bag but that isn't the case I guess since this tape was made in September 2009.  The tape is apparently 75 minutes long so I'm guessing it's an hour of her talking about the Manzo's & then 15 minutes of sex & likely in a restaurant bathroom because her ex said she was constantly trying to have sex with him in public places & I think we even saw her try to get some guy to screw her in a restaurant bathroom last season on Jersey Housewives!  Oh yeah, one more thing...she's 48 so this video could be more of a horror flick than a whore flick. 

photo courtesy zap2it.com

 

Glee ends & some show starts

Tonight on FOX at 9 PM is the season finale of Glee & I'm super excited to see what happens.  I wonder if Rachel & her mom will actually make out this episode because them singing together was pretty creepy if you ask me, why didn't they sing Brown Eyes or Fame rather than Poker Face?  Is it wrong of me to hope that they don't win Nationals?  I mean every show/movie always has the "underdog" win by a hair at the end, kind of the way they won sectionals.  Anyway, there's also some tweeny show starting tonight at 8 on ABC Family called Pretty Little Liars & I've never heard of it so I'm not sure if it's a new season or a new series but it's coming on so enjoy your viewing!!

Oh yeah, there is also a new stand-up special from the fabulous Kathy Griffin on Bravo! at 10.
 

3 Shows tonight

Well, my calendar doesn't say if these are premieres or finales but if you watch it I'm sure you know!!  9 PM on USA is Burn Notice followed by Royal Pains at 10 PM.  Also on at 10 PM is Happy Town on ABC.
 

Another Golden Girl gone

 Rue McClanahan dies at age 76.
 

Talk about desperate housewife!

What is up with crazy ass Danielle?  That crap she pulled on Monday's episode is going to cause such a huge ball of insanity.  We all knew she was imbalanced already but this really took the cake.  First she arrives at an informal charity event dressed to the 9's & in a Bentley & then she acts like she's a celebrity or the guest of honor when her entourage doesn't have seats.  Let me step back first, her entourage consisted of Hells Angels, a guy out on parole, and a very classy woman who had no idea what she was in for.  Now who in the hell arrives at a charity function with more than one announced guest?  According to the people at the event her entourage didn't pay & people who don't pay don't generally get to attend functions for charity, you are supposed to be giving money not taking it.  Then she starts off about how the Manzo's did this to her on purpose & she can't believe they would do something like this to that poor baby...blah blah blah.  Um, the Manzo's had nothing to do with it...just because they own the place doesn't mean anything, they didn't create the guest list or the table seating chart all they did was set up as they always would.  Once they did finally get a table set up the location wasn't good enough so Danielle & her posse left & blamed the Manzo's for it too.  Check out a clip here. 

I cannot wait to see Dina lay into her on Monday & I think that Kelly from NY & Danielle from Jersey should get their own show & it could just be called "Crazy".
 

12 days until True Blood!!

If you want to check out season 3 clips, minisodes, download posters & tons of other stuff then click here!  I sure hope this season is good; given the fact that they now have werewolves worries me that too many people will start comparing it to Twilight & it's nothing like Twilight...Twilight doesn't creep me out or keep me from sleeping some nights, it's not scary & is really lacking in the hot guy department.  True Blood is far better, adult, & has vampires with fangs which makes them hot!
 

TLC Premiere Day!

Tonight from 9 to 10 we have 2 new episodes of One Big Happy Family & then from 10 to 11 we have a new episode of The Little Couple, both on TLC.  Other than TLC we have a few other summer premieres as well, 8 PM on ABC is Wipeout and on NBC we have America's Got Talent and then on FOX is Hell's Kitchen.  On NBC at 10 PM is the series premiere of Losing it With Jillian.